Overwhelmed with Gratitude

As I sit here in the hospital bed trying to wrap my head around what's happened in the last 24 hours I find myself with one overarching feeling.  Gratitude.  I'm grateful most of all to the Lord for letting us meet our babies. I'm grateful that they're doing better than everyone expected for now.  I'm grateful for the knowledgeable  Drs, nurses, and nurse practitioners who know exactly how to handle preemie specific issues and are able to guide us through this experience.  I'm grateful for all of our family and friends who are sharing in our joy and joining with us in prayer for this whole situation.  I'm supremely grateful for such a wonderful husband who has not left my side.  I would never be able to face this without him.  There are many more things I'm grateful for but not enough time to type them all.

Here's some of that family I'm so grateful for!

The girls are doing better than expected although they're still jumping hurtles.  Penelope is such a fighter.  She's breathing well, gets mad if you mess with her too much, but enjoys being "hand swaddled" (one of our hands on her head and one on her rear making her feel almost cocooned).  Her biliruben levels were up so she's doing phototherapy.  She has to wear some eye coverings but they have sunglasses painted on them so they're adorable.  It looks like she's in a tanning bed.  Her little fingers and toes wiggle around when she's agitated or when she's dreaming...i don't know which, but it's precious to watch.  It was confirmed that she only has one kidney but none of the doctors seem concerned about it, we'll just have to treat her one kidney really nicely.

Penny's tanning bed

Lydia is doing well too. She doesn't have to have the phototherapy but she is having a harder time with the breathing.  They had to increase her oxygen today after trying to wean her from it.  They'll most likely give her another dose of surfactant in the morning.  She'll have to be intubated to do that but hopefully they'll be able to take it out quickly.  The more time a baby is on a vent the weaker their little lungs get.  So please pray for Lydia's lungs.

Lydia after a big day

Jonathan and I both have been able to help change some diapers and loved it!  It does my soul good for sure to be able to touch my little precious daughters.  They are so VERY small and seem so fragile but still I think they may be the toughest women I've ever met!  We just can't wait until they'll allow us to do kangaroo care (skin to skin baby holding time).  I think I might drown the baby in tears the first time I hold one of them! 

This is me holding Lydia's little head to comfort her

On a much less important note, I'm doing pretty well too.  The c-section seemed almost too easy.  Of course I was nervous going in and while they were putting anesthesia into my spine!  But once I was numb and Jonathan was allowed to come back into the OR everything was fine.  It was strange to be strapped to a table and not be able to see (or feel) what people are doing to you, but a welcome alternative to natural childbirth! I almost feel like I cheated.  I don't feel like I've cheated today though.  Naturally there is a good bit of soreness but mostly the exhaustion is beating me up.  I know I know...why am I writing a blog at 1am?  Mostly because I took a 3 hour nap this evening...but as soon as I stop typing I'll be out like a light I'm sure.  I've been up and down all day and visited the girls multiple times between pumping and it's been busy but wonderful.  Again, I'm just so grateful to have today.  The day after my girls were born and they're still with us.  I feel so blessed.

Here are a few more pictures.

Leaving the house to go to the hospital

 

 

getting prepped for surgery...I was pretty nervous I'll just have to admit

 

 

 

 

There are many more pictures to come, these are just the only ones I can find with a half functioning brain.  Hope you all have a very Merry Christmas!!!